According to Planned Parenthood, 1 in 3 women experience difficulty in achieving orgasm. In fact, almost 10% of women have never had an orgasm. Maybe that doesn’t seem like a lot, but think of it this way: if the outbreak of a certain disease is responsible for more than 7.7% of deaths in a population at a given time, the Center for Disease Control labels it an epidemic. And while there are over 20 different prescription medications to address men’s erectile dysfunction, there are none that address women’s inability to orgasm.
In 2009, the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior found that 91% of men had climaxed during their last sexual encounter, compared with 64% percent of women. But even more interesting? 86% of these men reported that their female partner also climaxed. Whatever the reason for this discrepancy, not only are women not climaxing as often as men, but the men they're having sex with aren’t even aware they aren’t having orgasms.
That’s not to say that a women’s inability to orgasm is a man’s fault. Although we see sex everywhere thanks to easy access to media of all kinds, there are still some subjects that are hard to tackle. It may just be easier to fake it than it would be to address the issue – especially if the sex is outside of a relationship. According to one study, 67% of women in long-term, monogamous relationships reported they had an orgasm with their partners the last time they had sex, versus 11% of women who were with a new partner for the first time. But shouldn’t the experience of pleasure be available to everyone?
Anorgasmia, or the inability to orgasm, is classified into four different categories by the Mayo Clinic. There is acquired, which means you have experienced orgasm but currently are not, situational, which means that you can have an orgasm in some circumstances but not others, generalized, which means you can't have an orgasm regardless of the circumstances, and lifelong, meaning you’ve never had an orgasm, period. Anogasmia can be brought on by a medical condition, such as diabetes, or by a new medication, or by physical trauma.
But in many cases, the cause is psychological. And while every situation is different, some of the same themes come up for women dealing with the inability to orgasm. These range from guilt and shame around sexual feelings, to poor body image and lack of confidence, to feeling unable to open up to a new or existing partner. Even common, day to day stressors can result in an inability to relax and let go, such as financial challenges or relationship conflict. And sex becomes – or always has been – unfulfilling and unsatisfying.
If you’re experiencing difficulty in achieving orgasm, talk to your doctor. They may recommend therapy, or medication, or both – anorgasmia treatment runs the gamut from cognitive behavioral therapy, all the way to a prescription for Viagra. For some, using a vibrator for masturbation is a powerful step in learning to communicate to receive pleasure. There are herbs, such as Chasteberry (also known as Vitex), that naturally increase libido. Maca is also known to balance hormones, which can have a positive effect on achieving orgasm.
“I had never had difficulty taking care of myself, if you get what I mean, said Melissa, a 31-year-old lab tech (we’ve changed her name to protect her privacy) and I would say that I climaxed with my partners 85 to 95% of the time. But in my last relationship, he cheated on me. I had always had a nagging feeling that something was off with him and I probably shouldn’t have been surprised. I tried to get past his infidelity but I just couldn’t relax anymore with him during sex and I stopped coming.”
“It took me a long time to date again after we finally split. When I met my current boyfriend, I made sure we spent time getting to know each other before we started sleeping together. He was very patient, and considerate of my need to get comfortable with him and build trust. But, in spite of how caring he was, I could not climax with him – at all.”
Inability to fully open up to a partner is a definite block to achieving orgasm. Dr. David Barlow, a psychologist at Boston University, has done extensive research on the relationship of anxiety to sexual functioning. His work has demonstrated that anxiety associated with past negative sexual experiences may interfere with relaxation, prevent arousal, and inhibit orgasmic responses.
But in many cases, anogasmia can be successfully relieved when partners decide to open up their communication and work together. And, after a friend told her about a natural product she used to recover from a broken heart, Melissa wondered if it could make a difference in her situation.
“My friend used a product called AVA to recover her center after she not only couldn’t get over her ex, but when he started another relationship and it threw her into a tailspin. What peaked my interest was hearing her talk about the sense of calm she experienced with she took it, and how her heart felt open for the first time in years, making her able to see the experience more fully, and move past the hurt.”
“Once I knew my ex had cheated, I became so self-conscious during sex. I no longer felt attractive – all I could think about was whether she was hotter than me, whether he liked her body better, did he think she was better at sex than I was? My anxiety was through the roof – and it came back once my current boyfriend and I started having sex”.
“So, I told him about AVA, and we agreed to give it a try – I would take two capsules and we would go slowly, with him checking in with me along the way as to how I was feeling.”
AVA, made by Limitless Life, was developed to work with the neurotransmitters GABA, dopamine, and serotonin, amplifying areas of pleasure and joy in the brain. First, AVA relaxes the GABA centers, drastically decreasing anxiety.
“The first time I took AVA, I immediately noticed that the tightness in my chest that would arise when my boyfriend initiated sex wasn’t there. As we lay together, fully clothed and just cuddling, I felt a sense of closeness between us that felt very new, and very safe.
Theobromine and kava increase circulation throughout the body, creating more blood flow in the brain – which some say is our biggest sexual organ – and to the labia and clitoris as well. And AVA contains a natural form of choline, which allows the brain to ‘pre-load’ dopamine. Thanks to this surplus of dopamine, the effect of touch is magnified and pleasure is not only intensified, but sustained.
“As a feeling of warmth spread throughout my body I noticed that, for the first time in many months, my thoughts weren’t wandering to the past; I was totally immersed in our closeness. It was like we were the only two people in the universe. So, when my boyfriend asked if he could take off my clothes, it felt right to be skin to skin.”
AVA contains extract of barley, which acts as an MAO inhibitor. Because it prevents serotonin and dopamine from being removed from the brain, extract of barley increases the height of – and extends – euphoria. You not only stay in the mood much longer but, once you reach orgasm, your system is set to release dopamine for an extended period of time, increasing the length and intensity of orgasm. And after you’re done, you still have dopamine left.
“My boyfriend was very sweet, and took his time. I think we were just kissing and touching for hours. I’m not going to share the dirty details with you, but not only did I have my first orgasm with him, but it was the most intense of my life. Once it started, I wasn’t sure it was going to stop. And our ‘afterglow’ lasted for hours.”
“We’ve used AVA a few times since – when we both took AVA our experience was mind blowing. We definitely don’t need it all the time but when we do use it, it brings us closer together, and that closeness continues long after the effects of AVA have worn off. I would recommend AVA for anyone experiencing difficulty achieving orgasm because of how well it worked for me.”
If what Melissa shared is true, AVA could be a breakthrough for millions of women who struggle with not only anorgasmia, but those who experience weak orgasms or a low libido. Whether you use AVA with a partner or on your own, it appears to be a powerful – and natural – solution to a problem that simply hasn’t gotten the attention that it deserves.
AVA is made from organically and sustainably grown plants, and is 100% natural. AVA – like Limitless Life’s other products – offers you the most potent, nutrient-rich ingredients available on the market today. Because Limitless Life works with farmers around the world who value clean irrigation, non-toxic pesticides, and healthy crop rotations, there are never any harmful chemicals or toxic processing involved in the making of AVA.
*This article originally appeared on Evolve and Ascend.